I wish, I really really really wish from every fibre in my scarred and broken body that I could be writing to say that after the traumatic wait we finally have had some good news following the results that were given to us yesterday.
But for now at least, it’s very sadly for myself, my family and our entire team not the news we’d hoped for.
The tumour is [taking a deep and slow breath] a Grade 4 Glioblastoma, IDH-Mutant. In non-technical terms that means it’s one of the most aggressive forms of Brain Cancer.
As always however let’s try our f*cking hardest to see the positives in this.
Firstly, the IDH-Mutant bit is really good news apparently although I would struggle as a project manager and not a doctor or scientist to tell you why. Perhaps it’s the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles form of tumour which basically says I don’t give a sh1t what you are, I’m kicking your ass. Sorry, I grew up in the 80s.
Secondly, my Neurosurgeon told me the pathology report has confused all of the Neurosurgeons, Neurologists and Neurooncologists at Queens Square (part of UCLH Hospital) where I’m being treated as whilst the standard tests say it’s Grade 4 but more advanced and newer tests say the genetic makeup of the tumour is saying something different which indicate a lower grade tumour. It is apparently the first case ALL of them in their many many years of service have ever seen like this as if they ever show different results it’s always the other way around. Again this is obviously very confusing for me but I am being told cautiously that this is positive news despite being unknown territory for them.
Thirdly, my age and fitness is again a massive bonus so thank you Lolita for keeping me fit by running after you all the time. My little monkey, helping in every way she can.
Regardless of the results I have been advised that I need to have Radiotherapy and Chemotherapy not immediately but pretty soon. This will most likely be for 6 weeks and 6 months running concurrently but I will be told more when I meet with the Oncologists soon.
All in all despite trying to remember the positives I’m obviously devastated and have spent a lot of time being held by Danny whilst I cry and go to very dark places.
In other moments however I manage from somewhere to realise that there is no point in spending all my time in the dark when I have a BEAUTIFUL daughter to cuddle and play sleeping bunnies with. I also remember that despite the results there is nothing at all apart from my warrior scar and the occasion sleepy moment that would give any indication at all that I am apparently that unwell so why waste all my time in bed like I’m that sick.
So Buttercup you might not be quite as harmless as I first thought you were but you’re still shining bright and reminding me that life, however short it may be, is for living so let’s do this and that light is not just for me but for all of you to be basked with so please if you’re reading this take a moment to appreciate life and all that’s in it despite the hard times we all go through.
I am so sad to hear this news but know if there’s anywhere that can help you defeat this monster it’s Queens Square. All our love and positive vibes. Rachel & the Hunt family.x
Sending all my love Cords
Tom H xx
I am tom Taylor
Ask cords who I am
Not good
But cords
Will win
I love you fuckface xxxxxxxxx
Loads of Love from BCN.
Animo!
Viv
Cords my heart goes out to you and your beautiful family. Keep fighting with your positivity. Thinking of you xxx
I love your positivity! Keep it up sweetie! You never know what’s around the corner ! Lots of love Penny
I reckon buttercup is so confounded by positivity , that it has slowed down.
Maybe enough positive endorphins can do this….it does happen they are called miracles.
Love and positive thoughts go with you.
Daphne. X
I reckon buttercup is so confounded by positivity , that it has slowed down.
Maybe enough positive endorphins can do this….it does happen!
Love and positive thoughts go with you.
Daphne. X
I’m so sorry to read this, sending you love and thinking of you all. Your positivity is so inspiring Cords. Lots of love xxx
Mucha fuerza Cordelia! Un abrazo grande desde España.
Noemi
You are truly amazing and an absolute wonder women. You will beat this. Thinking of you and sending you and your beautiful family all our love and positive vibes.
Mel, Alex and Emerson xxx
Oh gorgeous, this is really hard to read, you are truly amazing to be able to keep such positivity and see the sliver lining, thoughts are with you honey, stay strong okay, make the light happen!
Elf Xxxxxx
One step at a time, it is amazing what medical science can do now. Keel snuggling xx
You are such a ray of sunshine Cords!! Keep fighting strong! Sending you LOVE and healing light X
I’m so sad to think how you and your family must be feeling but your positivity and love for live shines through even this hardest of news. Keep feeling the positivity when you can and it will make a world of difference. Sending love and strength to you all xxx
Very confusing cords. Just to say that i read about a ketone (anti-sugar) diet this chef swore by for his brain tumour and also i have had friends with a diagnosis who have sworn by cannabis oil too, in conjunction with chemo. Maybe the docs will be able to give you their opinion about it. Lots of love darling xxx
Cords you keep out of that dark place and keep beings amazing.. thinking of you heaps xxx
You’re a brave strong woman. Thinking of you and sending positive thoughts. Keep strong
Nina x
You’ll get through this Cords – because of your mighty spirit and because you have an army of people loving you and behind you every step of the way x x x
Sad news to read. You totally have this though and everyone is in awe of your positivity and determination. Sending positive vibes, hope and love your way. Laura xx
I’ve read this a million times now Cords each time thinking that somehow the content is going to change. It’s not the results we wanted… but all the mutant ninja, unknown gradings and age related fitness sound Uber positive to me and something we can get our teeth stuck into. You are absolutely incredible – not just in your strength but in your honesty and we all love you so much. My only request is that we can all take on the persona of a ninja turtle to help fight this piece of cr*p… I’m going to be Raphael as he was my favourite at school! Love you millions – onwards and (the only way is) upwards…x
You are the strongest woman I have ever met! I’m so lucky I got to meet Loli and through her you and your family! I feel honored. All my family from here sends you a big kiss and me as well!
I don’t know what to say other than I’m thinking of you and sending love. Stay strong xxxxx
Hang in there Cords. You will beat this. All my love from Melbourne. xxx
Oh blimey, sending you and your family lots of love. We are just round the corner if you ever need anything.